We previously wrote about how Dr Chee’s bid for Parliament is quite similar to a job application, and that the voters of Bukit Batok SMC are the employers.
Like Dr Chee, Mr Murali has also been running up and down the estate telling his prospective employers how much he wanted to work for them.
This time round, we imagined how Ah Mu’s interview with Batok Batok residents might go.
Bukit Batok Residents (BB): Welcome to Bukit Batok SMC Mr Murai Pillai
Murali Pillai (AM): Hello, please call me Ah Mu. Please hire me as your MP. I will always put Bukit Batok above my own interests.
BB: Ok Ah Mu, can you give us a short self-introduction?
AM: Hello, I am currently working as the Head of Commercial Litigation in law firm Rajah and Tann Singapore. I have 16 years of grassroots experience, and served in the BB grassroots for many years under former MP Ong Chit Chung. I applied for the Aljunied GRC job back in 2015, but didn’t get it. I am coming back home this time round because I love you guys so much!!
BB: Err, noted. Ah Mu, Dr Chee said in his interview that he will be a full-time MP. How about you? Can you cope with all MP work when you are already so busy with your day-time job.
AM: First of all, I will not be a full-time MP. I will be part-time. But trust me, I can cope one. Just like how many residents who work two to three jobs say that it is ok, they will press on, I also will press on because I am driven by my passion to serve BB residents. Anyway, my day-time job also not that busy lah. I arrow all my subordinates to do most of the work for me, like what all bosses do.
BB: Umm, Ah Mu, did you just compare yourself with Bukit Batok residents who need to work two or even three jobs just to sustain themselves and their families?
AM: Errr… sorry sorry. You misunderstood me. It was an honest mistake, let’s move on.
BB: Right. Moving on, can you tell us why you are coming back to BB this time round? What about your previous promises to Aljunied? You didn’t get the job in Aljunied, so why do you think you deserve this job this time round?
AM: I must clarify that actually hor, I am coming back to BB because I love you guys so much. Please disregard the fact that I went to Aljunied. I will always put BB’s interests above my own.
BB: Now, Mr Chee Soon Juan said that you are a yes man and don’t have a mind of your own. And that you rely on your connections with big weights to get the job. What do you say to this?
AM: No, you are wrong. I will say, I will push. Why should I muzzle myself? And btw, I am a good choice to be your MP ok. PM Lee and DPM Tharman say one, they strongly endorse me. You see Low Yen Ling and Grace Fu following me around too right? They also say I am a good fit for the job. Even the badass gangster lawyer Josephus Tan also say. Of course you can count on me to be my own man!
BB: Wow, all your character references seem pretty positive. Surely there must be negative things about you right, besides you being a yes man and your unwillingness to be a full-time MP.
AM: Perhaps, but I think let’s not go into that lah. You know, character assassination is not good. Even Dr Chee also said I am a decent guy and don’t want to character assassinate me.
BB: Ok Ah Mu. Anything else to add before we end the interview?
AM: If you hire me, it means that you are hiring the rest of the Jurong Family to do the job too ah! You will have Halimah, Tharman, Desmond Lee, Rahayu etc working for you too. Good track record. Many for the price of one. Good deal right!
BB: Thank you for your time Ah Mu. We will consider your application, along with Dr Chee’s, and let both of you know the result by 9pm this coming Saturday, 7 May 16.